We build relationships over agreement

Estimated read time: 2 minutes



As much as people say that a good discussion with varying viewpoints is great, helpful and collaborative, disagreeing with each other doesn’t feel good. Even for those of us who love the debate.

With all the online and offline talking I do throughout the day, it’s crossed my mind that agreement is needed to build relationships. So even when there’s disagreement, which can be needed to move off the status quo, at some point there needs to be some level of agreement. Otherwise it can just feel bad.

Agreeing to disagree, by the way, hardly counts. Pfft. We are agree to disagree.That’s not really agreement.

I also noticed this when I get notes from some of you fantastic readers.

“I agree with 99 percent of what you say. The rest is bearable.”

“I love all of your opinions.”

Etc, etc.

I never get positive notes that say: I love your blog because I disagree with everything you say. Ha.



The point is that it’s easier to get along with people that we agree with. The thing is that when we truly share our authentic stories and beliefs, not everyone will agree with everyone at all times.

But it’s important that we practice some acceptance of each other – even if we don’t agree. Even if we don’t want to hang out. Even if we aren’t going to follow each other on Twitter religiously.

Being exposed to other viewpoints can actually help us live a more meaningful authentic story ourselves. To get started though we must be aware that disagreement doesn’t feel great and it’s OK to move past it.

Sometimes, we may just put aside an opinion – as hard as that actually is – and just listen to listen. Don’t agree or disagree. No judging allowed. I know: So hard! But try it.

It can help us build relationships we otherwise could have missed out on.